Thinking Out Loud – Fears


I really like hiding under the covers sometimes.

hiding under covers

Sometimes it’s because I am tired after a long run, sometimes it’s because I need to get all cozy to watch television (at which point I fall asleep in less than three minutes without fail) and sometimes it’s because I am hiding from the things that scare me.


I live in fear that Adidas will completely revamp my Energy Boosts.


So far, all minor tweaks and changes made to the model have either been hardly noticeable or for the better but if a complete model change occurs and my feet no longer like them, the dreaded hunt for the right running shoe would have to start all over again.

I am afraid of peacocks.  

The thought of their feathers spreading out freaks me out a littleOkay, a lot.

Actually, I think most birds produce a borderline fear in me.

It’s not a crazy big fear that you need to come desensitize me by sticking a bird in my face to get me over it or anything but I do not like the look of them or their faces.

I read this article yesterday about turkeys chasing runners in California. I think I will now add being chased by a turkey to my fear list.

Growing up I lived in fear of a plane crashing into my house while I was in the shower.

I think I am still afraid of this happening but I can’t hear the planes flying when I take a shower in my house now so I don’t think about it too often.

I do not like the mail.

I go days (fine, weeks) without getting it.

My mailbox is not at my front door so the actual walk to retrieve stuff I may not want doesn’t interest me.

Like what’s in there? What’s waiting for me?

It all stems from my divorce you know.

The random attorney letters (which were more like stacks of paper they somehow stapled and I never understood how such large stacks were stapled together) that always had the delivery timing of Friday afternoons.

Combine that with thinking one day I would receive a letter written via cut-out magazine letters to form words and yeah, you get the idea.

Who needs mail anyway? I informed the companies who wish to send me a bill that I have gone paperless.

The sad thing is, sometimes I actually get nice catalogs and checks. Even sadder, I sometimes miss RSVP dates to parties. Oops.

I am afraid of running out of peanut butter.

Thankfully the peanut butter delivery is always brought right to my door.

peanut butter

These six haven’t even made it to the pantry shelves yet. Still safe in their box. Do you know about the peanut butter in my pantry?

peanut butter


I am afraid of private callers on the phone.

I don’t accept them. If you can’t show me your number then I have no reason to speak with you.


I am afraid to register for a race too far in advance.

This is a pretty new fear, established in April 2014 when I had to drop out during the Fitness Magazine half because I was dizzy and didn’t feel well.

After finding out within minutes why I didn’t feel well (hello time of the month) and knowing that dizziness (and actually fainting) during this time has been a history of mine, I made that decision to never run a race at this point on my calendar again.

If I am going to run a race, I want to give my best effort which cannot be done every day of the month in my case for health reasons.

Half marathons I can sign up for at the last-minute or even plan a month or two ahead  but what if I wanted to plan further ahead?

What if I want to run a marathon one day?  As regular as I am, I am human and things change so mapping it out months in advance is no guarantee.

I thought I was afraid of running out of apples but suddenly I am down to ONE.

How did I let that happen?


What are your fears? Are they bizarre like mine?


Be sure to check out what everyone else is thinking about today!





Author: The Cookie ChRUNicles

Hi! I'm Meredith. Join me while I run and cook my way through single motherhood. It is always an adventure trying to teach my 12 year old son the benefits of an active lifestyle combined with healthy eating while of course, still leaving room for dessert.

24 thoughts on “Thinking Out Loud – Fears”

  1. I have been chased by turkeys while running! Many of my routes are around a nature center and in the summer turkeys are all over, roaming the streets. They freak me out, for sure!
    I’m also afraid of the mail, because, bills. I’m just afraid of needing to pay money in general. I’m also afraid of running out of toilet paper more than other people it seems, I think it’s my old stomach issues!

  2. We’re friends right? So it’s ok if I say you’re fears are bizarre! I can relate to the fear of running out of peanut butter (or any nut butter for that matter). The fear is real but clearly you have nothing to worry about haha!

  3. I’ve been chased by chickens/roosters before so I can understand bird issues. There was a peacock that would wonder around St. John the Divine, so I would steer clear of there. I am afraid of ledges and cold water–makes it very interesting to tour boats. I don’t trust my body and am always afraid that I will fall off, and I am really terrified of cold water, so thus the worst of everything.e

  4. I’m afraid of birds as well. I got chased by a rooster in Poland when I was a wee little thing, and I don’t think that fear has ever left me. I seriously can’t do birds, though. The beaks, the talons, the bizarre skin. Eeugh. And I’m afraid of running out of bananas, especially in the winter when they don’t ripen fast enough. I got down to 1 yesterday and went into serious panic mode.

  5. Oh man, I’m terrified of needles, can’t even see them on tv! Your nut butter collection is something that should be congratulated! Man! I’m terrible about the mail as well, but not because I’m afraid of it, but because I’m lazy 🙂
    I really like birds but am also terrified of them – I’ve never had a bird be nice to me, so I’m pretty sure I give off bad vibes to them!

  6. I am totally in awe of your PB shelf! I only have two jars. Now I’m thinking “what if I run out?” What if there’s an earthquake and I have to eat only what’s in my pantry right now? I’d only have a few days worth of PB.

    I guess what I’m saying is I now have a new fear 🙂

    I used to be afraid of a plan crashing into the house as well. I grew up next to an airport and one day a plane really did crash into a house in the neighborhood. I think I asked my parents if we could move every single day for a year after that.

    1. It’s worth stocking up with peanut butter because it has a super long shelf life and if the power goes out and/or you are stuck at home, you have what to eat…I would be afraid too that happened by me with the planes!

  7. Oh my gosh I love your peanut butter stock. I would be in big trouble if I kept that much PB in my pantry. Currently I have a Costco size PB in my cabinet unopened. I know once I open it it won’t stand a chance. So for now I am keeping that seal shut. I tried cashew butter this week from TJ’s – not too big a fan. I really am liking sunflower butter.

    I am afraid of getting stuck in an elevator or a bumpy plane ride. I am not the best flyer but have learned to deal with it because I do it so often.

    1. If I had a Costco container of chocolate covered raisins in my pantry, I would certainly be in trouble. Those were my favorite…Yeah, I hear you on stuck in the elevator and bumpy plane rides. I am a decent flyer but the last time I flew a few months ago, I was actually not feeling very well and it was the worst to be stuck on a plane feeling like that. I hope to have a better flight next week because that feeling is slightly scaring me should it ever happen again!

  8.! I laughed out loud at your fear of peacock feathers! 🙂

    One difference between us, I live for getting the mail.

    One similarity, I am fearful of running out of P.B. too!!!!

  9. I LOVE this post. I have some super wacky fears as well! For example, I have a fear of running out of eggs. I must ALWAYS have eggs!
    I also have a fear of signing up for a race too early. my fear stems from psyching myself out. I always think that I’ll fail…

  10. Hi Meredith! You’re funny! I’m so glad I stumbled upon this post. First of all, I love the mail. But I can see why you wouldn’t. Second of all, I used to be very scared of fires as a child and had a small emergency kit packed by my door in case I ever needed to escape. Totally weird. With the race thing, I don’t know about that. I don’t run a lot, so race fear doesn’t bother me. Happy Thursday! 🙂

  11. Good blog! I truly love how it is simple on my eyes and the
    data are well written. I’m wondering how I could be notified when a
    new post has been made. I have subscribed to your RSS feed which must do the trick!
    Have a great day!

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