My son asked me to drive him to school yesterday morning instead of taking the bus.
My first answer was no because if I start driving him, it will become a habit and it’s not a habit I am looking for us to form.
But then he told me why….
You see, there’s this girl he may like and she is always at school earlier than the buses arrive so maybe her mom drives her to school and if I were to drive him too, he would have the opportunity to talk to her before the day begins.
Of course I drove him. I am cool like that.
I am also cool because I like to buy the holiday-inspired cookies. Even though I can bake my own, the boxed holiday goodies always remind me of being a kid.
And wait, did you see what I posted on instagram last night?
How cool? My sweet potato from dinner last night was heart-shaped when I cut it!
So if you recall from Wednesday’s post, I briefly touched on the topic of peer pressure and watching the 80’s movie Can’t Buy Me Love.
Last year right around this time I actually wrote a post all about bullying and the whole use of the word cool.
I decided that I wanted to share a good portion of that post again with you today rather than just giving you the link to the archive.
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Would you consider yourself a leader or a follower?
I think I would say I am more of a leader than a follower, yet really, I am more of the type of person who doesn’t care much about leading or following.
I always have and always will do my own thing and not care what others are doing or what they are thinking.
Growing up I was blessed with amazing friends. I was never affected by peer pressure.
I can honestly announce to the world that I never have (and never will) try a cigarette or any form of drugs.
My friends never held this against me and if they did, I wouldn’t have changed my decisions – the only decision I would have changed would have been my choice in those friendships.
I realize that I am a rare breed yet I am hoping that I can raise my son to understand how important it is to be your own person, respect yourself (and others) and honor your own beliefs over the pressure that comes with growing up.
Yet even as grown ups, there is peer pressure.
Pressure to be married by a certain point, live in the right neighborhood, drive the right car, wear the right clothes…
Speaking of clothes, women in particular focus so much on their pants size that they let a number printed on the inside label of their pants determine their self-worth.
Holding yourself accountable to fit into a brand’s idea of what a size 2 is may come with the pressure to run as many miles as you see other bloggers running, exercising as often and for as long as the next person on the treadmill, along with trying to emulate someone else’s diet plan.
Then there is the pressure that comes with parenting – having the right stroller, using the right diaper bag, enrolling your kids in the right preschool.
Breast-Feeding vs. Formula Feeding? A never-ending debate and divide loaded with pressure and opinions on both sides.
We may live in a tech savvy world compared to when I grew up but the truth is, peer pressure, as children and as adults, remains the same – the never-ending desire to simply be COOL.
But what does this “cool” mean exactly? And who is in charge of deciding who or what is cool?
“Mom, it is just known. You just know.”
Unfortunately, I agree with the little boy. You just sort of “know”.
Lately every other sentence that comes out of the kid’s mouth involves what is cool, who is cool and who knows who isn’t or what isn’t cool.
I am tired of this cool topic.
Right now, bullying is so prevalent in our schools and in society that it is having life-threatening effects.
It isn’t as simple as the Gooch taking your lunch anymore.
While my son definitely understands the importance of treating others with respect and wouldn’t hurt a fly (literally, he is afraid of bugs), I feel it is my duty as a parent to further address the topics of peer pressure, bullying and the desire to be cool.
I decided we need to watch the movie, Can’t Buy Me Love. My version of an educational documentary.
Being “cool” and having the right friends and material things isn’t always what it is cracked up to be.
Hopefully Ronald Miller and Cindy Mancini will help him to understand that.
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Have a terrific weekend and to my Jewish friends, wishing you an easy fast as Yom Kippur begins tonight at sundown.
Favorite Halloween Snack/Treat when you were a kid? Totally the Entenmann’s Halloween Cupcakes with the candy corns on top!
If you are a blogger, do you go back and reread your old posts?
What’s on your running agenda for this weekend?
The Cookie ChRUNicles 
I don’t think a follower or a leader. Something super terrible is that I always turned down cigarettes and pot and all that without think twice, all the way through high school. Then when I became obsessed with controlling my weight I was the one that decided to buy the and start smoking in secret! Worst decision ever! I’m so glad I was able to quit for 3 years now after smoking for 3 on and off. And I completely believe that peer pressure gets worse as we get older, especially with the technology. Don’t even get me started on the beast feeding situation. I’m a bottle girl.
No worries, I wont even go there with the bottle versus nursing debate lol.
You know exactly what is on my running agenda this weekend. Don’t even play 😉 I’m glad that I never was too concerned with being one of the cool kids. I wanted to be liked, but I didn’t care about being in the in crowd as it were. I largely thought they were all ninnies. Peer pressure will always be around, so long as we have peers. That is just the way of the world. But when it involves your kids, it gets even worse because you start to wonder if you are cheating them of something.
Good luck this weekend! I will be watching on instagram for updates.
I will definitely admit that at times growing up I caved to peer pressure. You are right that there is still peer pressure in adulthood, it just looks different.
I used to love candy corn when I was younger but not anymore! I think eating more than a few would give me a stomach ache.
I have gone back and read a few older blog posts, and its always interesting to see how things have changed even with my writing in the past year!
I don’t care much for candy corn either but if I have one, sometimes I think I like it so I eat more. They used to be so so cute though on the Entenmann’s cupcakes.
I’ve always prided myself on not caving into peer pressure. I didn’t drink until I was 21 and even still I rarely do, I have no desire to ever try any kind of drugs/cigarettes. We make our own cool 🙂
You and I are a lot alike. Same form of cool…
I have to admit that I have no idea what the cool kids are doing these days… not that I ever really did 😯 I’ve always been one to march to the beat of my own drum, and I was lucky to never really succumb to peer pressure. You’re absolutely right that it never really goes away, though… we just start calling it different things and trying to pretend we’ve grown up, when really, some people just get stuck in high school.
At back to school night for 6th grade, one of my son’s teachers tried to change the belief that all peer pressure is bad. She’s teaching the kids that if you hang out with people who typically do the “right thing” and encourage you to do the same, you are being peer pressured to do the same. I never thought of it like that.